|Us with the Easter Bunny in FL in 2010|
And then, wham, something happens. We hit a rough patch with a couple of weeks where he struggles to keep his choices in check, when he is suspended from the bus for a day or not allowed to go to after-school for a day or who knows what else. And when this stuff happens, I get SO upset, like it's the end of the world.
Sometimes I cry or yell or pray so hard.
I think to myself, "I thought we were done with this. I thought we'd figured things out. I thought the medicine would stop times like these. That's why after never wanting to, we decided to even do it, right? And we still have problems? I feel bad for him he has to go through this. I feel bad for ME I have to go through this."
But the truth is, there's no magic answer. No magic pill. There will always be time periods that will be harder. Maybe there's a trigger - some event in his life, some change at school. Maybe sometimes we'll never know why.
But that's all it is, a brief time in life. We'll do our best to work together and get him through it, teach him to do better next time and where he went wrong, and just go on loving through the whole thing.
That's what I have to tell myself. This isn't the end of the world. It's just a blip. It's not the end result, just part of the journey. We just need to get through it, through today, tomorrow, next week until things get easier again. But not forget that they will get hard again sometime too.
I've finally come to the conclusion he will always be a different kind of kid with maybe more than his share of struggles, but when I look past all that what I see is a smart boy with boundless kindness and compassion and curiosity.
He is above all loving, honest and a deep thinker. He is intense in all that he does, good or bad, LOL! But beneath the rough times beats a very good heart, a very special soul and a very active mind.
As they say, this too shall pass. And there we will be, me and my boy, on the other side :)