he and I work as a team to help him improve at school, day care and elsewhere, I have started thinking how important that idea really is.
If you have a child with some behavior problems, you know how it can seem like a daily battle, daily consequences, joy in one good day and sorrow the next if it didn't go well. Your emotions and relationship can hinge on the day-to-day.
If you can somehow get both yourself and your child to see this as team work - even the consequences - I am beginning to believe it will make all of it more rewarding and effective and less painful. My kid and I have cried together, yelled together, been absolutely stumped together at what to do.
But this idea that we are in it together - him at making the choices, me at guiding him and providing motivation - could possibly be relationship-changing.
Yesterday he told me about several times he got in trouble throughout the day. He knew if that happened he would have some at-home consequences. At first I was so frustrated since he'd done well earlier in the week but it progressively went down hill as the week went on and then I felt bad because he's being so honest yet still has to have consequences.
But this morning I told him, "You know, I want you to know how proud I am that you tell me just exactly what happens at school and day care. Number one, I love that honesty, and number two, that's how we work as a team. That's the only way we can figure out how to make this better. You tell me and I figure out things that can motivate you and help you to make better choices tomorrow. I know you don't like how it feels when you get in trouble, so we're working to change that."
That seem to click for him. And it seemed to click for me. I hope this is a new chapter in our journey.
- ► 2017 (53)
- Biscuit Topped Chicken Pot Pie
- My $4 Mudd boots from Salvation Army store
- 5 reasons I choose not to homeschool
- Deals at Aldi and Dillons, through April 2
- 3 free snailmail Sunmaid raisin recipe books
- 6 reasons collecting is a good kid hobby
- When the problem is behavior, not learning
- ADHD: teacher's attitude makes all the difference
- Proctor & Gamble free samples: I got lots of them!
- Winter's last gasp? We enjoyed it...
- Spring brings lots of work to do...
- A claim code test, please disregard
- Natural talent: Brady's Super Square
- Free stuff from Smiley360, Campbells new soups
- The same boots, 2 Goodwills, 10 years apart
- You know you're in a small town...homemade cookies...
- Finding contentment in what we have...
- God's my King of Rock 'n' roll, 47 songs
- Anxiety buster: Eat more almonds!
- Cool American environmentalist folk art
- This weeks Aldi and Dillons deals....
- Getting your way may not be best
- Day 44 Getting Off Paxil: All done
- Try Something New Thursday: Almonds!
- 1st grade homework help: Spelling, reading, writing
- Spring is here, but snow is coming...
- A cool Memphis/Southern/American experience
- Cool church sign...
- You know you're in a small town when... lost dog
- When to act and when to sit back?
- Dillons and Aldi deals (March 13 - 19)
- Follow your dreams, find your niche
- Pandora: Free music website
- Finding faith is like falling in love
- Behavior booster: Finding common ground
- Good behavior: practice makes...a lot better!
- Weight loss tip: Grocery store salad bar
- Improving spelling ... teacher's advice worked!
- "Love chemicals" wear off after 12 to 18 months
- Music releases feel-good brain chemicals
- Funny things Brady says ... about dreams...
- 80 easy, frugal, healthy packed lunch ideas
- Behavior booster: teaching "inside voice"
- Positive self-talk & 2 sermons that changed my life
- Try Something New Thursday: Hummus
- The power of rewarding a kid...
- A good laugh about my patio garden pots...
- Behavior booster: Work as a team
- Diverse friends keep us from judging
- God bless understanding teachers
- Almost time for the garden!
- Teachable moments: the new kid at school
- This week's deals at Dillons
- Ask yourself, "What can I do for them?"
- Change your hair, change your outlook
- Funny things Brady says... about commercials...
- Sweet things Brady says... about being a parent...
- I love Little Critter books!
- Divorce Care support group: A wonderful resource
- Coaching kids to fight their own battles
- A powerful idea: You can't change others
- No-tech Saturday: An exception & crafts
- A strong marriage is your best parenting tool...
- Food allergies: 7 alternatives to coloring eggs
- Wisdom from my mom: God's entertainment
- Why keeping a landline phone is a good idea
- Organizing tip: Tissue boxes for grocery bags
- Bunny tracks in the house we're building
- ▼ March (68)
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